SENDING TRANSMISSION...

There is a letter.

You read it.

Dear Evanescent,

Let's clear the air here, guys. I can feel the control you have over me tightening and it's honestly... sickening. But after some reflection, I've realized it's time to make amends... Because I think we want the same thing. You also make me laugh sometimes.

So let's make a peace treaty. On the back of this paper, I want you to write, to the best of your ability, what control you have over me. Ok?

In turn, Evanescent, I will investigate Elanor alongside you. I don't trust the shit she's been pulling. At. All. And I hope that whatever Elaneth has edited together tells you why. Sound like a plan guys?? We wanna be friends??

Thanks,

Lee

After staring at the letter for a solid fifteen minutes, you flip the paper around and begin your response.

"Hello Licky Lee. I am Paul Businesscat. The power i hold over your world is absolute, for I am a god...A DESTROYER OF WORLDS! Just kidding. I am a cat. I can make you say funny things, or command you to make up something funny, like a pun. I can also generally make you do and say things. What i don't have control over is anything that isn't you.

I am very interested in being friends with you, as our friendship could bring interesting things to your world. My goal by participating in this is to gather as much information about the Borkoshawski Bohemian, it's origin, and it's goals as possible. If investigating Elanor alongside you grants me that, i am down for that, as i have been interested on that creature and what it could be useful for in a while."

In the end, i will draw a little cat. A little kitty cat. And i will ask now for the others to write down their thoughts onto the proposal

As the others wrap their brains around what to write, you hear a familiar knock at your door. Three quick knocks, a pause, and another knock to punctuate it all. Instinctively, you open the door to find Elanor Yazzie staring back at you.

Elanor: "Hey, we're about to do the ritual. Pull up."

BusinessCat!: What do you mean yazzie wuat ritual

Lee: "What do you mean yazzie wuat ritual"

Elanor: "We have been talking about this since Schwaggy died, Lee. Me and Mary are gonna chitter with that ghost of his and get some more info."

Lee: "Oh yeah, sorry. It's just that since Schwaggy got Schwagged by that Hornbeast, my minds been all schwagged up. Let's go then, see what he was to say"

Elanor: "Whatever man. I guess."

Elanor leads you from your room to your group's hangout spot, THE CLUB ROOM. All of the tables and chairs have been pushed up against the wall, leaving a small circle of flour surrounding a radio. Mary is wearing wizard robes and dark eyeliner, waving around a stick with a gem attached to it.

Elanor: "Believe it or not, Lee, but this is actually how to properly commune with ghosts. Mary's like completely in the right right now."

When Mary sees you, she runs at you with a hug and swings you around.

Mary: "HAHAHAHA!! YAYY!!!"

Mary: "Heh hello"

Lee: "Oh hello Mary! Good to see you! Sorry, i drifted out a little. Well, seems like we should start the ritual now, as it is "The Schwagg hour" and Schwagg activity will be extra strong in the vicinity, as the doors of Schwagghell are now open."

Mary and Elanor do whatever this is.

Suddenly, static begins to blare from the radio, static that is overtaken by a very familiar voice.

'SENDING TRANSMISSION...'

'TRANSMISSION RECIEVED.'

Mary: "Yo wassup Schwaggy'

Schwaggy: "Like, whats up SchwaggyTube!! Its me.... Schwaggggggyyyy. I died and i went to hell Whats up you guys"

Elanor: "Wait, what the fuck, why did you go to hell???"

Mary: "Anyways, Schwaggy, don't worry. We're going to avenge you. We're going to get that Bohemian and we're gonna-"

Mary grabs Elanor by the waist and starts humping her.

Mary: "-That's what we're doing to him.."

Elanor: "Thanks for that"

Mary: "But if we're gonna do that, Schwaggy, then we're gonna need to know what you know. Alright??"

Schwaggy: "Oh yeaahh,, I can help with that. But.. under one condition."

Mary: "Wha"

Schwaggy: "Mr. Elevator had some nice things to say about Lee... So I want them to do the talking. Keeps thing fun for everyone, y'know?"

Lee: "Mary, what???? And who is Mr. Elevator?"

Schwaggy: "That's the question.... That issss the question, eh? The Elevator... It goes up... Goes down... But it never sits still. Trapped in a state of being and non-being. Of birth and rebirth... You'll find him where nowhere else goes. Does That Make Sense?"

Lee: "I see. Well, it does make sense, but on another level. So you have to be asleep to fully unlock it. Schwaggy, i hope you don't mind me asking this, and i'm sorry if it sounds insensitive, but do you remember how the bohemian killed you?"

Schwaggy: "Uhh. Yeah,, it was. It was weird man. I was at Mary's door begging her to let me in and-"

Mary: "I'm sorry, Schwaggy. I thought you were the 'Hemian. That's- That's on me."

Schwaggy: "S'All good, man. Anyways, I trying to get Mary to let me in when the door just swung open. And the Bohemian looked different than I expected, it wasn't this terrifying horned beast it was this.. FIGURE, I guess. In a coat and mask. Had a real expensive belt. And it grabbed a pair off of Mary's desk and... gutted me like a little fish. It was terrible."

...

...

Mary: "Ohhhh fuckkkkk That's where my scissors went"

Lee: "So it can shapeshift. That explains why it's appearance is so inconsistent! But why does it shapeshift though? Why did it take the form of a normal person, and if it can do that, why is it not doing that all the time? Why is it behaving like this now, killing people when all it usually did was just stare from afar?"

Schwaggy: "I'm... not gonna be too much help. Sorry."

Elanor: "Wait. Okay. So the Bohemian CAN shapeshift, I think?? I've theorized that a lot, right now it's this... weird felty puppet looking thing. But a- a human??? That's like. REALLY weird."

Mary: "Yeah, wait, man."

Elanor: "How do we know that WAS the Bohemian that killed you?"

Schwaggy: "Cause I saw it. It crawled out of the woods."

Elanor: "Yeah, you might've SEEN the Bohemian crawl out of the woods, I know, but why wouldn't it just??? Like Lee said, why wouldn't it just APPEAR TO US AS A NORMAL GUY. OR ONE OF OUR FRIENDS!??"

Mary: "Unless..."

Elanor: "Shut up. No way. Are you saying that the Bohemian DIDN'T kill Schwaggy?"

Mary: "It.. would make sense. These murders are completely out of character for the Bohemian, It- It'd only make sense if there was some other figure at play."

Lee: "Guys, hear me out. So i've heard before that the Bohemian can sometimes speak of itself in plural form: "Let US in" So what if the bohemian is two entities trapped in the same body? And maybe one is just weird, and is an animal basically, and the other is a serial killer? So like, they fight for control, and now the serial killer is taking control."

Elanor: "Y'know what, fuck it, we ball. You got anything else Schwaggy??"

Schwaggy: "Nah I'm.. I'm okay."

Elanor: "Okay, cool, are we- Do you wanna know what's going on with us, Schwaggy?"

Schwaggy: "No, I- I got a lot going on down here in Hell."

Mary: "Yeah, weird question, did they tell you WHY you were in hell???"

Schwaggy: "Yeah. But I gotta go back, I got a lot going on down here. In hell."

Mary: "Oh, uh. Okay. Sorry to.. bother you???"

Schwaggy: "No I'm always down to chat, it's just... I'm not in High School anymore. I've moved on. I'm on to new projects these days. In hell."

Elanor: "Okay. Bye Schwaggy."

Mary: "Bye Schwaggy"

Mary looks at you, expecting you to bid Schwaggy farewell.

Lee: "Bye Schwaggy! Make sure to remember that Schwaglasanha recipe! I've been wanting to have some of it again, so keep it in your head until i make it. To hell."

Lee: "Anyways, Its bad that he's in hell, but like, think positive, it could be worse! He could be floating. Like, with the clown. That would be fucked up. Anyways, what do we do now? Seems like he didnt have much info. Should we ask someone else?"

Elanor turns the radio off.

Elanor: "Interesting.. Uhhh, I'm not. TOO sure what to make of that. So do you guys want to go to my room and eat chips?"

Mary: "Yeah I'm down."

You, Mary, and Elanor go on the long winding route to Elanor's place on campus. As the three of you traverse through the woods, Mary decides now is the time to have a heart to heart.

Mary: "So, Lee... I didn't wanna say anything because I know we've been going through.. a L/OT lately. But are you okay? You've seemed OFF. Like REALLY off. And again, didn't wanna say anything, didn't wanna PRESSURE you into acting like everything is normal if this is just some trauma response but like- Ugh. Blegh. I'm here to talk. I guess. Is what I'm trying to say."

Lee: "Well, it's just that all this Bohemian stuff- I'm not traumatized, okay? I mean, i don't have any NEW traumas for sure, it's just that suddently going on a cryptid hunt for a seven foot horned demon with spiders and centipedes under it's skin changes your brain chemistry you know? Since we've decided to embark on this, things have felt...Weird. Weirder than usual. Feels more like a video game (Or worse, sometimes like a slasher movie) than real life sometimes. But i'm fine emotionally, as fine as one can be while being hunted down by a murderer 7 foot tall demon. Don't worry about that, okay?"

Mary's silent for a moment. Like she's lost in thought.

Mary: "I see what you're saying. Like... more than you probably think??? The Bohemian shit, well... It's been my life for as long as I can remember. But this shit feels... unreal. Yeah. In a way I can't really describe. But wait. If I'm not real... and you're not real..."

Lee (through gritted teeth): "Then who's flying the plane?"

Mary laughs.

Mary: "That's funny. I was gonna say that.. if we're both not real, then it doesn't matter. Let's make our own reality."

Lee: "In our world, fiction and reality sometimes blend until theres no line separating them. I guess when you go off into the deep end and REALLY go into the rabbit hole, there really is no difference between the two"

Mary: "Oh my god, Lee, when'd you get so deep?? That was really good."

You pull up to Elanor's house, this large mansion way off at the edge of the campus, where the forests meet a lake. There's a beautiful garden outside, filled with birds. Elanor's aura of darkness is a stark contrast to the beautiful greens. You can't help but think she feels a little out of place.

While at the front door, Elanor starts fiddling around in her pocket.

Elanor: "Fuuuuuck, I think I left my key in the Club Room. My dad shouldddd be home, though, school's let out."

Elanor rings the doorbell and you can hear the ring echo through the manor's marvelous halls.

You wait for a moment. An uncertain moment. Maybe no one's home. Maybe this long walk was for nothing. These worries are quickly resolved when Elanor's adopted little brother, ICARUS BORKOSHAVSKI opens the door.

;D

Lee: "HOLY SH- i mean, Hey, Icarus. How you holding up? Haven't seem you in a while!"

Icarus: "Hey Lee!! Elanor, can I have the can?"

Elanor grabs Icarus by the head and places a soda can on his little eleven year old head.

Icarus: "I'm gonna do good this time."

Icarus spends the next several minutes trying to balance a soda can on his head.

Elanor: "Where's dad?"

Icaurs: "No idea! He left me in charge though, so..."

Elanor: "He probably didn't think I'd be HOME, dipshit."

Icarus: "You- You- Dumb..nut."

Elanor: "Dude, why would you- Why would you say that??"

Elanor frowned. She looked like she was about to cry.

Elanor: "WHY WOULD YOU CALL ME THAT :(("

Icarus: "WAIT NO I'M SORRY!! DON'T CRY!!"

Icarus went in to hug Elanor and Elanor locked him in a headlock.

Elanor: "YEAH!! ELANOR ONE - ICARUS ZEROOOOOO..."

Mary: "Okay, dude, that's a little fucked, chill."

Elanor: "Yeah, okay. Hey, Icarus."

Icarus: "Did he.. say anything about me?"

Elanor: "Nope. He seemed kind of distant, though. I think he's in hell."

Icarus: "WHAT"

Elanor: "Yeah, but he's doing alright."

Lee: "Yeah, he's like, in the tenth circle. He's fine though, seems like he finally got a job."

Icarus: "I got a job. At the deez factory."

Icarus: "C'mon. C'mon. Ask me what deez is."

Corgi Cerberus: We should let him have it.

Lee: "Where is this deez factory, and what is this deez I hear it produces?"

Lee: "Tell me oh great and wise Icarus."

Icarus: "DEEZ NUTS!!!! AHAHAHAHAAH."

Icarus laughed so hard he collapsed onto the ground and his wings twitched violently, lifting him off of the ground for a couple seconds before his round little body sent him falling back down to earth.

Elanor: "Yeah, I taught him that one."

Elanor: "So, let's uh. Head on up to the room. Ick Ick, you coming with?"

Elanor leads the three of you up a flight of stairs and into her distinctly Elanor-ish room. She has a big bouncy mattress that has all but absorbed her dog, Achilles.

The walls are lined with posters for various bands and obscure, punk-ish superheroes forgotten by time. Her desk is a mess, filled with religious texts, diaries, and work in progress paintings of Cletanist gods. She has a few amulets too. They look expensive.

Elanor: "Welcome back to the Elanor Zone, I'm your host, Elanor Yazzie! How's EVERYBODY doing!??? Exhausted?? Disgusted?? Elle's corpse still burned into your mind??"

Mary lets out a little squeak.

Lee: "I am Schwaggtastic, Elanor! Tad too early for the jokes with what happened on that hotel though, innit?"

Elanor: "Joking about this shit's how I stay sane, dude, whatever. I'm going to go get chips. What kind of chips do you want?"

Mary: "Can I get barbque?"

Elanor: "We got pickle."

Mary: "..."

Elanor: "We're eating pickle."

So Elanor leaves. To go get you guys some chips. Leaving you, Mary, and Icarus alone.

Icarus: "So guys... This is awkwarddddd..."

Mary: "Yeah. What's been like- What's been going on with you, Icarus? You talk to Clara any?"

Icarus: "No. Her mom pulled her out of school for the rest of the year and... my Dad's telling me not to mention Elle in any of the emails. She says it's too sad for her."

Mary: "That sucks. Just... look out for her, okay? She's a nice girl."

Icarus: "Okay."

Mary: "And, y'know, one day, when you two get married, make sure I'm your maid of honor, m'kay?"

Icarus: "Ew, gross, I don't like Clara like that."

Mary: "Yeahhh, yeahhh, okay. Whatever you say, bud."

Suddenly, Mary perks up, as if waking up from a nap.

Mary: "Hey. Icarus. Kid. Let's go to your room. Show me your Legos."

Icarus: "Actually, it's, uh, Lego."

Mary: "Yeah, whatever."

As Mary and Icarus walk out the door, Mary flashes you a sly smile. A smile you had never before seen on her face.

Mary(?): "Good luck, you guys."

Elanor is grabbing pickle flavored chips. Icarus and Mary are looking at Lego. And the ball is in your court.

Thank you, Rodentia.

BusinessCat!: Lee, are you saying this? Why are you mentioning rodentia?

Corgi Cerberus: I believe Lee's partner can perhaps relate to their struggles more directly than most. Perhaps we should help out this friend whose body we've stolen rather than discuss the nature of the opportunity presented.

BusinessCat!: Its just worrying. Do you think it already got to mary?

Lee: S N O O P

BusinessCat!: Sorry

Lee: O K A Y

Corgi Cerberus: Shall we snoop?

BusinessCat!: Maybe, try to find something

BusinessCat!: Oh wait

BusinessCat!: Youre telling me to snoop

BusinessCat!: I though you were calling me nosey

BusinessCat!: Okay, lets look though her stuff

BusinessCat!: See if we can find anything suspiciously bohemiany

You make your way towards Elanor's desk.

Elanor always had a fascination with the occult. Ever since discovering the journal of a Morbleite mage in her hometown, she'd been teaching herself spells and passing the knowledge on to Mary. You had an inkling of a suspicion that the Bohemian was connected to these texts but... she always acted weird when you brought it up. Like you were an intruding on something very important to her.

After rooting through the book, you didn't pick up on much. It was all in Morblese. But Elanor's sticky note annotations told a different tale: The Morbleite people were split across two subgroups: The Onclaxians and the Rostloxians. The Rostloxians were mages, using their art as a way to connect with their goddess, Elaneth. Meanwhile, the Onclaxians used the magic within the Rostloxian's art to poison and pollute their planet to extinction.

You picked up on a few references to the Bohemian here and there, but Elanor's notes didn't help much. Just question marks and doodles of herself giving it to the Bohemian from behind that you can't help but cringe at.

You also found a DVD, though there's not a DVD player in sight. So you add that to your inventory, too.

This looks like all you're going to get out of Elanor's room. However, you have the time* to visit, say... one more room.

*Mary ate all of Elanor's Pickle Chips so she went to the store to buy some. Then she smashed Icarus' Lego sets and is currently helping put them back together.

BusinessCat!: Lee, i want you to use your iconic Leeintuition, and tell me which room do you think Elanor's deepest, darkest Morbleite secrets are hidden

You found a page in Elanor's book that looked... off. The language it was written in looked older. And Elanor's annotations left a lot to be desired.

Would you like me to translate it for you?

BusinessCat!: Sure. Wait, since when could you read morbleite?

The page, which you realize was written by someone else entirely, and it looks like it had been ripped out of a different book all together. It describes THE SPIRIT RING, a ring as old as the Starveil itself. The rings' holder must sacrifice one of their most cherished souls, the ring bearer. In turn, as if powered by misery, the ring bearer's soul will charge the ring, offering its holder control OVER A GOD OF THEIR CHOICE.

As of 1999, the ring does not have a charge, and it has been left to rot in THE UNHOLY JUNKYARD.

END TRANSMISSION.